—First Dates; The Horror of Awkwardness
Written By : Annalisa Frumento
I am probably the least qualified person on the planet when it comes to proper relationships and dating culture. But you know what they say… the coach doesn’t play! I have been on my fair share of first dates, and to be fair a lot of them have been fun! But all of them and I mean all of them start off with me having the anxiety of somebody being hunted for sport. There is an innocence to meeting somebody in a one-on-one setting for the first time, and if you lean into that, it can be really fun! If you guys met on a dating app though, like many of us do, meeting somebody for the first time PERIOD is terrifying!
The awkward ‘who’s paying this bill?’ Type bill questions and not knowing what side to walk on when walking on the street is terribly dreadful, but is that just part of the fun and the storytelling? One time on a first date I had a guy ask me if “this is the right time to kiss”... spoiler alert, it definitely was not. But, I found that endearing and very funny, it is always better to be upfront than to let things linger. I laughed and said “No!” while laughing and just that simple cut in tension and awkwardness made all the difference. We even went on another date after that one! It is too easy to coast by and never really learn a person, and if the lingering nervousness gets in the way, my suggestion is just to do the natural thing. So yes, ask who's paying the bill before you order, and make him walk on the side closest to the street (which he should already have been doing by the way)!
In the era of everything being online, it is easy for somebody to have a crush on a false perception of somebody. By no fault of their own though. I mean, just look at me, my entire instagram feed is curated to a tee, but I am the most unorganized person you might ever meet. There are numerous pictures of me in red lipstick, but I always wipe it off right after. That persona isn’t really me. This is why on a first date, the bandaid needs to get ripped off sooner rather than later. Tell him you’re nervous! Tell him that weird joke! If he laughs, he’s for you, if he’s not laughing, move right along girl! Be yourself, be weird, make it awkward, because life is too short to go on a second date with a guy who doesn’t even get your jokes.