Why I Keep a Non-Aesthetic Journal

Written By : Jacqueline Rappa

From the outside, my journal, also known as my commonplace book, is beautiful. It’s hardcover, berry-colored, and has my name elegantly printed on the front.

But when you open it, each page is unpredictable. Scribbly handwriting, messy sketches, collages made from torn-up magazines, and random lists. No two pages look alike.

It wasn’t always like this. For a long time, it sat empty. I was too afraid to “ruin” such a gorgeous notebook. I didn’t want to mess it up.

Then one day, I’d had enough. I grabbed a stack of old magazines, started cutting without thinking, and glued the scraps straight onto the pages. No plan, no perfection. Just expression.

I’ve always been this way. Hesitant to write my name on a new folder because I didn’t want it to look used. Saving outfits for special occasions that never even happened. Picking a neutral nail color because I was scared I’d get tired of the vibrant shade I really wanted.

Using this journal as a true commonplace book has been a breakthrough for me. At first, I wanted it to be filled with beautiful art and neat handwriting – something worthy of being flipped through by others. But over time, I took my power back. I stopped chasing perfection in the little things. Now, it’s a reflection of me: unfiltered and evolving.

A journal shouldn’t be a place where overthinking is allowed. It should be a space where the deepest parts of you spill out freely – messy, honest, and entirely your own.